Exactly On The Stage As Off 9.11.2014

Exactly On The Stage As Off

I would like to be exactly on the stage as off,
Think of everybody there as friend
Who’ll bend to, likes to, wants to
Be engaged by me;
A give and take for maturation.
Always obstacles of sort,
Uneasiness that stops the art
From being free,
Which isn’t fair to them or me –
The freedom multi-leveled;
Just to let it flow, the rest to follow:
That’s what I would like to happen:
Unflappably at one.
But apples of desire stick you in the mire,
Performance up the spout or down the drain.
Look at entertainers,
The biggest in the business;
Fallen on their asses more than once;
Spirits free, their art created constantly,
They keep the flow.
They keep on going.
As for me, just when I think I’m ‘there’,
I can distinctly sink when least expected:
Someone famous in the audience can do it.
Perfectionism, fear of judgment, criticism
Manifesting through the hands, knees, voice…
Fear, the boss.
This year’s resolutions:
Besides a headstand everyday
And shunning vanity
It’s to become exactly on the stage
As off, presuming I’ve an art that’s worth the say.

Exactly On The Stage As Off 9.11.2014 (found on a scrap dated 10.27.2012)
Vaguely About Music II;
Arlene Corwin

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